The Practice of Having

We all know the importance of feeling gratitude, especially at this time of year when gifts are exchanged. But do you really know how to feel gratitude? Do you realize just how much you have?

I know you have a lot because you’re reading this. That means that at the very least you are using a phone that costs several hundred dollars, and I’m willing to place a strong bet that it’s not your first phone. Or you’re on a laptop that costs even more than your phone, and once again, probably not your first laptop.

We in The West live in a state of abundance that is easily taken for granted. It’s so easy to forget what we have while focusing on what we want that we don’t yet have. While many of us are indeed grateful for the goodness that surrounds us everyday, I discovered a practice that truly intensifies the feeling of gratitude, and it feels good! It’s from a book called The Having by Suh Yoon Lee and Jooyun Hong.

The practice works this way. Each time you spend money, you intentionally feel the experience of Having. This is more difficult than it sounds and takes some practice, because transacting money is so easy and because it requires that you pause for just a moment while you’re checking out of the grocery store or clicking the Buy Now button. As you’re executing the transaction, just think to yourself I have the money to buy this. It will bring a smile to your face.

Now if you’re are in debt and using debt to make purchases, I recommend you practice Having first while paying that down. Having a credit card balance at 21% is not what this is about.

The second part of Having is a written exercise. It is something I do every evening before retiring and it definitely shines a light on what you have and increases the feeling of gratitude.

It works like this. You write down something you have in the form of I have _____________, followed by I feel _____________. For instance, I have a comfortable home to live in that keeps warm in the winter and cool in the summer. I feel secure and wealthy whenever I think about this.

The thoughts that go into writing these statement cause you to focus on just how much you do have, and by connecting the feelings of gratitude directly to this, you really do feel grateful. I suggest you write two or three statements every night, or even during the day when you’re motivated.

I’d love to hear how this makes you feel after just a few days of doing this. Please share in the comments below.